The Hot Dog Crisis
by Denied Fate
Summary: Well I'm doin a new review o_o; NOTE: This has NOTHING to do with hot dogs...it did to start with, but then it got really crazy o_o READ IT, ENJOY IT*hopefully* AND REVIEW, IT PUH LEEZE!


The Hot Dog Problem  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own ANYTHING in this story o_o I was really bored while writing this and I kindly ask the creators and owners of these things:*Final Fantasy 8, CardCaptors, Dexter's Laboratory, Sailor Moon* to not sue me o_o Pleeeeaaaase? I'm poor and stuff o_o Well anyway, this story is MAJORLY screwed up, but maybe it'll amuse you! Ennnnnjooooooy!  
Zell:*chomps on a hot dog and lounges back in the cafeteria* Mmmm, this is THE LIFE!  
Squall:*sort of rolls his eyes* Whatever.  
Rinoa:*smacks Squall and watches him cower like a dog hit with a newspaper* Be nice!  
Squall: Whatever.  
Rinoa: Shut up.  
Squall: Whate-*gets hit again* OW, DAMNIT STOP THAT!  
Rinoa: Don't say the W word again.  
Squall: Whatever.  
Zell: *kind of blinks*  
Rinoa: *smiles charmingly* I wear the pants in this relationship.  
Horny Student: *looks up her duster and drools* You suuuuuuuuure do, bay-beeeeeeeee.  
*all hell breaks loose for a second, and the student is there with his eyes all anime swirly like and Rinoa is holding a mallet*  
Rinoa:*does a Xena war cry* WHO WANTS SOME?!?!  
Zell and Squall: ..........  
Rinoa: *hits both of them for the hell of it and laughs hugely, showing some fangs*  
Zell and Squall: @_@;;;;;;;  
Everyone else in cafeteria: *sweatdrops*  
*a big, hairy, nasty lunchlady walks over and grabs Zell, giving him a wet smacking kiss*  
Lunchlady: *sounds slightly like King Kong might* How are you honey?  
Zell: *turns a bit red* I'm fine, dearest.  
Squall: *narrowly holds back a laugh*  
Rinoa: *sweatdrops* ........  
Lunchlady: *rips off all her clothes and reveals she has a REALLY hairy back*  
Every single person besides Zell and lunchlady: *pukes*  
Squall:*screams like a girly man and runs out full speed*  
Rinoa: *follows, waving her underwear about* Wait for meeeeeeeeeeee!  
Quistis: *pops out of nowhere and follows Rinoa with a gunblade* BACK OFF, HE'S MINE!  
Rinoa: *hisses and becomes CatWoman* NU UH! I SAVED HIM AT THE END OF THE GAME, SO HE'S MINE, BIYOTCH!  
Quistis: Well, I never! *bitchsmacks Rinoa*  
Squall: *stands there and blinks amusedly* Whatever.  
Quistis and Rinoa: *hear the whatever and run after him again*  
Squall: *does another girly scream and takes off running*  
Author: *turns on chase music and erases Quistis's hair*  
Quistis: *screeches* WHY'D YOU DO THAT?  
Author: Cause I could.  
Quistis: *whines* Erase Rinoa's hair then!  
Author: Uhhh...no o_o  
Quistis: Why not?  
Author: Cause Rinoa and Squall make a cuter couple than you and Squall.  
Rinoa: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN STRAIGHT!  
Author: Shut up, Rinoa.  
Rinoa: Why?  
Author: Cause I said so.  
Rinoa: Nyeh!  
Author: I think I wanna take Squall!  
Rinoa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
Quistis: HAHA  
Squall: *seriously considers hanging himself* Whatever.  
Everyone: STOP SAYING THAT!  
Squall: .....  
Lunchlady with a Russian accent: *runs at Squall* COME HERE, CUTIE ASS!  
Author, Rinoa, and Quistis: HEY!  
Squall: Oh...shit...  
Author, lunchlady with a Russian accent, Rinoa, and Quistis: *chase after Squall waving various undergarments in the air* COME HERE, CUTIE ASS!  
Squall: Oh please, oh please....*finally gets to his dorm room and slams the door shut in all the girls faces*  
All the girls: Awwwww.....  
Irvine: *walks by*  
All the girls: *take off after him except Rinoa who remains silent* C'MERE, CUTIE ASS!  
Squall: *peeks timidly out the door to see Rinoa*  
Rinoa: *grabs him and drags him out, kissing him passionatly*  
Some weird looking officer guy with fake eyelashes and grey hair: PDA!  
Entire world:*chants* PDA...PDA...PDA...  
Rinoa and Squall: *break apart from the kiss and glance around nervously*  
Officer: Squall, I'm gonna hafta ask you to give up Rinoa.  
Squall: *goes all Titantic scene like* Noooooo, but I love her!  
Rinoa: *holds out a pleading hand as another officer drags her away* I'll never let go!  
*cheesy music starts*  
Officer as soon as Rinoa is away: *grabs Squall and touches his ass*  
Squall: O_O!!!!  
Officer: *laughs like a little girl and runs away*  
Squall: HEY MAN! Feeling my ass costs money!  
Officer: *giggles and disappears from sight*  
Squall: *snaps* Now I hafta do it with Quistis to get some moolah...  
*Selphie runs in from nowhere talking about a million miles an hour*  
Selphie: Suhar is hreat, suhar is HOOD!  
Everyone: ......*sweatdrops*  
Selphie: *giggles insanely and prances off, Irvine close behind with a bottle of speed*  
*Seifer struts in*  
Seifer: Where's Chicken Wuss? I promised we'd go...somewhere today.  
Everyone: OOOOOOOOOOH! YOU ARE A YA-OI!  
Seifer: *grumbles* WELL THEN SO IS HE!  
Quistis: DIBS ON SEIFER'S TAPE!  
Rinoa: NOOOOOO I WANT IT!  
Seifer: *runs back in laughing* IRVINE AND ME ARE GONNA DOOOOO IT!  
Irvine: *follows behind with some weed* OHHHHH YEAAAAAH  
Seifer: ORGY!  
Zell: *runs in when he hears THE WORD* OHHHHHHH YEEEEAAAAAHHHH!  
Seifer: Squall is a virgin!  
Selphie: Like a viiiirgin!  
Squall: *grumbles* Whatever.  
Rinoa: *whispers to Squall* At least it's not true...  
Squall: *slaps Rinoa* Shhhhhh _;;  
*Ellone walks in*  
Ellone: Can we go to McDonalds? I want an Egg McMuffin.  
Squall: No.  
Ellone: Please?  
Squall: No.  
Ellone: *Darth Vader like* Squall...*gasp, gasp* I am...your brother...wait, your sister!  
Squall: IT CAN'T BE! *shivers* Incest...  
Everyone: *shivers*  
Ellone: Shhhhh _  
*Li from CardCaptors walks in*  
Li: Umm...o_o;  
Everyone from FF8: o_o;;  
*Meilin follows Li in*  
Meilin: LIIIIIIIII I LOVE YOUUUU!  
Li: *screams and hides behind Rinoa* AHHHHH HELP ME!  
Rinoa: *protects Li and kicks Meilin away*  
*Sailor Moon walks in*  
Sailor Moon: SAILOR SENSHI SPARKLING STARBEAM OF PERFECTION MOONRAY OF ANOERXIA HEART OF PRETTINESS FLUFFY PONY SPARKLY TWINKLY STARRY THINGIE IN THE SKY FLOATING JUSTICE PRETTY LADY DARIEN'S A MANWHORE MUSICAL PLANETS OF POWER AND COMPASSION PEGASUS BELL ANGEL WING SILVER MOON CRESENT WAND RAY MY MEATBALL HAIR IS NOTHING MORE THAN SOME REALLY LONG FAKE BLONDE EXTENSIONS THEY STOLE FROM A DRUNK PASSED OUT 2 CENT CRACK WHORE ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD IN AN OLD COUNTRY BUMPKIN TOWN SOMEWHERE NEAR MASSACHUSTES AND SPINNING SHINING PINKY AND RED POLKA DOTTED HEART OF LOVE AND JUSTICE FLYING TOWARD FREEDOM AND POLYGOMY WHILE DARIEN SUPPORTS INCEST WITH LITTLE WHORE RINI ATTTTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!  
Everyone except Sailor Moon: *sweatdrops* O_O;;;;;;;;  
*DeeDee from Dexter's Lab hops in*  
DeeDee: *presses Squall's...button* OOOOH, WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DOOOOO?  
Squall: *eeps*  
Author: O_O;;.....I DIDN'T WRITE THIS!  
Ultimecia: *walks in*  
DeeDee: OOOOOH, Grandma?  
Ultimecia: THERE YOU ARE!*grabs DeeDee* WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?  
Everyone: O_O  
*Ultimecia and DeeDee disappear as well as everyone except the ones from Final Fantasy 8*  
Quistis: That was...interesting...  
Seifer: Sure was...  
Squall: Wanna go to WalMart?  
Everyone: SURE!  
*theme music* THE END!  



End file.
